I want paradise in my relationship!

People sit in front of me every single day and share on how they desire a magnificent relationship.

? “I want amazing and fiery sexing that leaves me fulfilled. I want a partner that has a deep desire to be with me and that I can share my heart with. I want a partner that makes me laugh, loves the things I do, and that can be serious and yet connective!…” ?

On and on they go sharing about this perfect relationship that they want to manifest.

How it will make them feel. The adventures they will have with this person. The sensations of desire and ecstasy that is the stuff of our most juicy fantasy.

It sounds like paradise in each and every word.
They want the most luxurious tropical island of a person!!!

And they can have it!

The magnificent person that comes into your world and sweeps you off of your feet. Gives you breathtaking moments when you first meet and leaves your heart singing. Every sunrise and sunset in that other persons eyes. You want the laughter that fills the mornings and deep shares and sexing that fills the evening skies. You don’t want to go home from paradise but instead want to soak in every amazing quality!!!

The relationship that stays romantic, fluid, and passionate throughout the tests of time.

Though, this morning as I sit sipping my coffee with a view of the ocean and and a jungle coated mountainside, breathing in the luscious moments of sun…

I think … “Sometimes paradise isn’t alway paradise. ”

There are fallen dead rotten plants all around the paradise island. Remains from past hurricanes that have washed through and the rains will come out of nowhere
The roads can be treacherous… even if they are way worth the drive! And while beautiful sometimes the sun is just too intense in it’s shine.

Does this make it any less poetic or take away the moments of true bliss?

Even the most magnificent paradise or person will lose it’s luster after a time!

It is true that we can manifest and create a relationship that often feels like paradise with another person. Though we also must take a good look at our paradise island… see, appreciate, and know that it can’t always be perfect.

We can have the perfect moments of bliss but we also must see the perfect moments of heartache and disconnection. We must see that sometimes the things that turn us on about our partner will also be the very thing that drives us up a wall in other moments.

We look at future relationships and focus on this idealized picture but we forget to think through the idealized picture of the low moments. The moments when the storms are ripping through your little paradise.

As a relationship ages, especially romantic relationships, they tend to reach points of lull. They reach points where the old scenery isn’t doing it and where new ground must be found or the relationship will slowly die.

Where each partner must reach out and expand. The paradise island must extend out and find new growth or be washed away.

Though, in relationships, we think about manifesting this other person or having our partner change into this other person. We forget that our perceptions, thoughts, and our own expansion and growth is how we create our paradise.

The thing we forget is that paradise is in the eye of the beholder. That we can take the most treacherous moments and see them as an offering for more paradise and depth in our relationships.

We can look at the perfection of the moment with a person instead of finding the perfect person. We can embody paradise and have it radiate from us and thus call in a person that matches that and brings greater paradise to the relationship.

There is no such thing as a perfect relationship.
Though there is paradise in relationships!

You can have the mind-blowing sex, the deep connective evenings, and laughter filled mornings. but you also must accept and love the storm filled emotions, the passionate moments of disconnection, and the ever changing scenery.

Leaning into your own growth and your view of paradise is how you truly create an honest and authentic paradise.

Love, Light & Blessings,

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