I want you and crave you.
Sitting across from you all I desire to do is melt and surrender. Surrender to the safety of your energy, of your arms, and of your touch.
And I see you desiring in your core to do the very same thing. You can’t keep my gaze for very long before you must look away. The energy between us is healing and yet electric.
But we don’t.
We hold.
We breathe in our own bodies.
Containing and restraining.
Leaving us both held and blocked.
Sitting like statues.
We teeter on this precipice.
Wanting and craving and knowing there is healing to be had for both of us. There is energetic opening and surrender to bliss in this connection. We have already proved that…
But are we willing to pay the price?
I don’t think you are…
So I try to protect you while my heart screams to release.
You want to only skim the surface.
You say you can hold to the surface and avoid the depth. Can you? Can you really?
I am a deep diver and search for depth…
Once I’ve seen the depth in something the memories and sensations are there for good. Always calling to me.
I found safety in that depth for the smallest of moments. I tasted a bit of surrender in that depth.
Can I hold to skimming the surface?
I’m not sure.
And in truth I’m not sure you can either… you go so much deeper than that. You deserve so much more than that.
And I don’t want to see you hurt. I don’t want to have to watch the pain in your eyes as you struggle between your energetic depth and the path you believe to be yours.
My head tells me to run and save you from yourself.
My heart… well my heart sings a different tune.
To block out connection because you think you can save another person is entirely ego. Maybe I would be standing right in the way of the beauty and magic that both need. Maybe there is a divine lesson.
Yet, I stand in limbo.
Am I willing to skim the surface when I have seen the depth?
Will this tear me apart or break me beautifully open?
This story sounds very familiar to one I’ve seen and witnessed before in another… Dare I make that same leap?
To listen to my ego that wants to protect. To guard. To restrict self, other, and energy?
Or
Step forward into this unknown territory knowing that both of us could get hurt.
Knowing that despite boundaries and blocks… my mouth will water for the taste of you, my body for the feel of you, and my energy for the dance with you.
The question remains…
Dare I jump off of that cliff? And try to simply skim the surface?