The Connection of Oral Sex!


There is nothing like the feeling of having my lover deep inside my throat, though I have found, to my surprise, that many women despise orally pleasuring their man.

Often women see this act as a major turn-off or a chore, and engage in it only as a sense of obligation when they want their own oral sex and so will simply deal with it.
I love how I start to tease my lover’s cock with my tongue and then slowly and lightly start to take him into my mouth. The tender but hardened tip rubbing on the back of my throat, my tongue sliding over the tender spot right below the head, and the pulsating in my pussy as I take him just beyond my gag reflex. Hearing his moans and having him run his hands through my hair as I hit all the right spots.
There is nothing like looking up into my lover’s eyes while he is deep into my throat, and to see the passion and vulnerability all in one glance. It’s truly one of the best moments in sex for me.
However, it’s not just hot, but also a spiritual moment for me. This is when I feel connected to my lover as I look into his eyes and see all his barriers vanish and the glow of orgasmic energy radiating from him.
My favorite position to perform oral sex is when I’m on my knees in front of my lover. I find this position both incredibly powerful since I can see my partner’s reaction, and also incredibly humbling as I take in the beauty of the situation. Some would say that this position and this act are demoralizing and take away my power, when, truthfully, these are the moments I feel most powerful and have the most control.
At any point, I have the ability to change speed, stroke, or simply stop. No one is forcing me to engage in this act, I love and revel in this experience.
However, this has not always been the case in my life. I remember the first time I was asked by a boyfriend to give him oral sex; I was disgusted by the thought. I remember being so scared of him ejaculating in my mouth that I was literally shaking. I’ll admit that I ended up throwing up on my boyfriend at the time because honestly, neither of us knew what we were doing.
Also, being the good girl that I was, I had preconceived notions from society about how “good girls didn’t do that.” Well, society was flat wrong! The problem is, many women remain in that state of disgust or are simply ashamed of enjoying performing oral sex well into their adulthood.
Beyond simply enjoying giving oral sex, there are actually many proven benefits to this act.
The power of semen
Semen is almost pure protein, and has the amazing ability to nourish skin, teeth, and hair. The elements of semen act like an astringent and can help clear up skin conditions. Forget all those expensive facial products, ladies!
More benefits of semen
Semen has been shown, in multiple studies, to have natural mood-altering and anti-depressant properties. This is due to semen having the hormone oxytocin, which acts to elevate mood and cortisol, which in turn increases affection. Also, it has trace elements of melatonin, which is a natural sleep-inducing agent. Altogether, they create a non-drug-induced boost of feel-good.
Works muscles
Using your mouth to give your man oral sex will increase the health of your facial muscles, which will decrease fatty tissues, sagging skin, and overall blood flow to your face. This will leave you with glowing skin and a nice toned face that can look years younger.
Helps with lubrication
As women, our vaginas are connected to many other areas of our bodies, and one of these areas is our mouth. When we are engaged with our mouth during sex, this increases arousal and lubrication to make penetrative sex more enjoyable for the woman. So as you are increasing your lover’s arousal, you are also stimulating your own system.
Breathing
Oral sex forces you to use deep belly-breathing, which is a benefit to your own sexual energy. When we are engaging in shallow breathing, it can lead to shallow orgasms and arousal. When giving oral sex, you are no longer able to breathe through your mouth, and so are more likely to engage in diaphragmatic breathing. This will increase your sexual energy flow throughout your body.
These are just a few of the benefits of this type of sex for women, but there are many health benefits for the male too, including, but not limited to, increased sensation, decreased prostate cancers, decreased blood pressure, and many more.
So how do we go from Yuck to Yum?
* Engage in oral sex for your pleasure. As long as you are not causing your partner unwanted pain, have fun with the act. Play with it and do what feels good to your mouth and body. The more fun you allow yourself to have, the more enjoyable it will be for your partner in the end. Slow down and go at the speed that works best for you.
Also, if you are only doing it out of a sense of duty, then your partner is going to feel the difference and you will be creating inauthenticity in the relationship.
* Talk with your partner or to a sex coach about any shame regarding this sexual act. Many women hold old belief systems around what is and is not okay to do in the bedroom. The best way to get past these shame triggers is simply to be vulnerable and talk about them.
Tell your partner what you like and what you don’t like. If you enjoy having your hair pulled while you are doing it, then ask. If you don’t want him to touch you, then ask. If you prefer him lying down instead of standing, then ask. If you don’t want him to cum in your mouth or want him to cum somewhere specific, then ask. Set your boundaries with your man in order to make it pleasurable for both of you.
Most men will be happy to oblige with your desires in this area.
Article posted on Rebelle Society

Beauty of the Double Goddess Session


I love doing a good bodywork session. I find the process beautiful and spiritual as I see my clients grow and relax into their own divine natures. Although I love all my bodywork sessions, I have a special place in my heart for those sessions where I get to share the energy with a fellow Tantric Goddess!

I recently had the opportunity to do some joint sessions with my colleague and mentor, Kendal Williams. There is an amazing energy that is created in a Double Goddess session where two women are able to create a truly memorable experience for their God. Each session is different in the way the session progresses, the depth of the session, and the energy that culminates. The beauty of these sessions is that just like unique gems each Tantric Goddess brings a different and special personal energy into the session. It’s even more special when those two Goddesses have a prior connection and so are able to synchronize their movements and add complimentary energy. Here is a short peek into one of these sessions that I hold so dear in my heart…

The session began by my fellow Goddess and mentor inviting our client into the room with a warm and genuine hug. I could tell there was caring energy already between practitioner and client, which put my heart at ease. We all spent a few minutes talking about life, weather, and Tantra. Then the gorgeous session began. We all began grounding and breathing. As we touched our God’s heart chakra, I could feel energy moving up my body, merging with Kendal’s energy and mixing with the energy from our God’s heart chakra as it opened. As I moved my hands up his spine, I could already feel his Kundalini energy rising. We asked permission to remove his garments in a manner of worship and prepared him for what would be a glorious session.

The energy in the room rose as we began to synchronize our movements on our gentleman. I could not only feel his energy but could feel the other Goddesses’ energy and it was as if a symphony of souls was taking place in that moment… His masculine strong energy, with my feminine energy, mixed with her powerful but feminine energy. I look at this very special and beautiful soul under my hands and feel his vibration rising under my strokes. Then I look across this man’s body to Kendal and see almost a glow of light around this woman as she is in a state of honoring of the same soul.

It is a beautiful dance as a chorus of energies collide. I hear a breath of ecstasy escape our God’s lips as he experiences an energetic orgasm that goes on for several minutes under our soft focus. As we begin to slow our strokes down and send loving, grounding energy into our God, I feel like crying for the beauty of the moment. I complete the bodywork with connecting third eye to third eye. Kendal steps out to get us all water as we all reenter this Universe. As we walk our God out of his session, I am overwhelmed with a sensation of gratitude to be able to share another one of these beautiful sessions with my colleague and mentor, as well as with a tantalizing masculine as he grows and expands.

Yes, these sessions are for the client but the beauty created in these moments fills my soul and pushes me to grow a little further each time I share one of these experiences. I feel blessed and more connected to my own body, to my spirit, and to those who walk into these sessions with me. This is how I am living my “Fuck Yes!” life!

*Please note that these sessions are not offered through Addison Bell. In order to reach out to fellow practitioner Kendal Williams please visit her website: http://www.tantrictransformation.com

For information regarding Tantra or Coaching sessions reach out to www.addisonbell.net/contact

Sexual Drought!

547d66404ed95_-_sex-life-ivf-2-lg

I lay there and have a strong desire to be held in that moment. To be held and kissed, and penetrated on a multitude of levels. It’s funny because a piece of me WANTS sex in that moment and then another piece is stuck in a sense of ambivalence about the whole thing. As I ponder, I think about how things have changed so quickly for me in the sex department. Guy A just wasn’t a fit even though he was really nice, but I’m not one to string people along if the chemistry is not there. Guy B and I aren’t really speaking at the moment and we both need a breather. Guy C is simply going to be labeled an asshole in my book from here on out. And my negative mood and complete absence of sexual desire for a week or so sent Guy D packing for the hills. So I think, “Well, this royally sucks. I am officially in drought territory!”

We’ve all been there. Where we are wanting to connect intimately and sexually with another human but for some reason our options are limited. Now, I will say that often these “options” are self-limited because we have standards for who, when, and in what manner we have sex. For myself, I am very careful with who I choose to have sex with because I know that this person is going to become part of me from there on out. Then there are also the times when you mentally want to have sex but your body is not on board. In times of stress it is harder for us as humans, and especially women, to become aroused and open to engaging in sex. So you could desire it mentally but your body may not respond to these thoughts and efforts. These and many other scenarios can lead to what I call the sexual drought!

Our sexuality is attached to our creativity and our mental and also physical well-being. When we are not engaging in sex, we can sometimes notice deficits in other areas of our lives. That being said, I don’t necessarily think a sexual drought is a bad thing, if managed correctly and is only for a short period of time.

My belief is that this time gives one the ability to reflect on where they are with their sexuality, what they need, what they may look forward to trying in the future, and simply to re-evaluate the types of sexual relationships they want to engage in. This can also be a great time to check in with yourself on how you are treating yourself sexually. Are you simply having sex for the sake of having sex? Are you taking the time to connect with your own body? And are you honoring your body in sexual relationships with others? This is a great time to reintegrate with yourself.

So how do we manage this drought period and come out better for it? Here are a few tips:

Touch yourself: During this drought period it is important that you maintain a sense of your own body. This can be as simple as taking the time to spread lotion on every area of your body and really tune in to all the sensations you are experiencing in that moment. Really sink in to your own touch. This also goes for taking the time to masturbate. This does not mean pull out the porn and lose all track of your own body. This means take the time to really FEEL your body – to feel how it is to be touched in different areas and focus on energy going from the bottom of your spine up to the top of your head. Feel as your Kundalini energy rises and build it up to a point where you can circulate it through your body. This type of self-touch will keep you from losing touch with yourself when not having sex. It will keep your brain chemicals in an open and creative space and keep your mood at a higher vibration.

Let others touch you: There is no reason for you to be devoid of touch completely. This is when you find other alternatives for touch than sex. If you plan on seeing a friend, then ask for a hug. It’s probably easier for women, but go ahead, step out of your comfort zone, and admit to someone that you need a heart-connected hug. If you know any children, then ask them for a hug (in a non-creepy way). I know frequently if I am in need of a hug I will ask my young nephews and they are totally willing to “bear hug” Aunt Addison! Children’s love can be so pure that sometimes this is exactly the type of energy you need. If those two ideas do not work, then reach out to a massage therapist and get some good focused attention. One of the best ways to keep your sexual energy up is to get a tantric bodywork session with myself or another practitioner. This allows for not only touch, but touch that stimulates sexual energy through practices we can help teach..

Keep your passions: Anything that keeps you engaged and passionate about life will also keep your sexual energy and overall passion alive. When we are focused on lack, then that is exactly what gets called into our lives. So if you are taking the time to engage in things you love and enjoy, then you are calling in just the right energy for a fun and playful sexual relationship.

Give yourself meditative time: This does not necessarily mean to sit cross-legged on the floor in silence for hours at a time. What I mean by meditative time is to take the time to breathe and really think about what you want out of your next sexual relationship. Think about where you are headed in your life and what your current desires are overall. Spend time manifesting that next wonderful sexual relationship.

For more tips and ideas to getting your sexual life back on track TODAY… book an appointment HERE.