Become Tied Up & Twisted In Your Dreamgirl

 

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Photos taken by -Photography In Wonderland

If you know me, then you know I adore music and have different artists for every mood. Music inspires my body and soul, and today, I am in a very soulful mood. I lie here in the grass on a beautiful spring day as the sun shines through my strawberry blonde hair and onto my pale white skin. Then my music library shuffles to Dave Matthews Band and the song “Dreamgirl” begins my turn-on, and then continues with “Crash Into Me.” Both of which make my soul sing with desire and orgasmic energy. It feels very fitting for this divine moment. I start singing along and thinking about how EVERY woman should have at least one man, if not more, in her life that looks at her this way. I close my eyes and dream of one of my lovers sitting next to me and staring at me with a mischievous boyish grin of desire and hope. Taking in not only the sun reflecting off of my body, but also looking deep into my soul to see all the beautiful little messy parts of me that he adores. It brings a beautiful smile to my face. I start to dream of my “Dream-man” where we continually and playfully ‘crash’ together! Chasing after one another in an animalistic playful way that is also sensual, where we are eating each other up, and can’t get enough at that moment.

Every woman should be looked at with this intense love and passion! Every woman should be considered a divine forest of intricacies that is to be discovered and devoured. Where they are viewed as some beautiful work of art that frequently hear how they turn their man on physically and emotionally. Every woman should hear how their man gets “tied up and twisted’ when thinking about their woman’s body. Where they are being chased by their man and are viewed as the most amazing dream where a man continually wants to dive deeper and deeper into her body and soul, and also where she sees all this intense desire in his eyes when he looks at her.

I meet with so many women that hate themselves and all the little imperfections that create their divine uniqueness. As a woman myself, I get it and can’t say that I love every single aspect of myself every moment of the day, but as women, we should feel like our lovers are reveling in all those little pieces. I am all for women learning to love and embrace themselves, and so this does not take the responsibility off of the woman for loving herself, but a divine masculine has the ability to show his Goddess even deeper levels of her own divinity.

In order to reach those depths of divinity, however, she needs someone to “hold” her and not just physically, but also emotionally hold space for her to open. This means beautiful orgasmic moments along with moments of tears, laughter, and if she’s anything like me, sometimes a great big mixture of the two at once. It will be like watching the most beautiful volcano erupt over and over again the deeper you take her. However, this requires a man to be in his divine masculine energy where she can fully trust and allow herself to go to these beautiful depths. When a woman is in this place, you can see the energy radiating off of her being, and her beauty seems to be increased tenfold. She is sending out love and openness into the world and bringing you right along with her on the journey.

Many men talk about wishing their woman was more playful, but you may need to help her drop into that playfulness. Women on a primal level were made to be chased, and men were meant to be our pursuers. Men should be looking at their woman like she is the most divine prize to be won over and over again, and should be tapping into their most primal instincts as men. Every time you have sex with a woman, you should be discovering her like it’s the very first time because, honestly, you have never truly had sex with this version of her before. Women are constantly changing and never the same and so explore her, devour her, hold her so close that she can surrender to not only you but herself.

Throughout daily life, I often hear comments about how we should not be “objectifying” women. I totally agree that women are people to be appreciated for more than their bodies. However, with these messages, I feel, as a society, we have turned into a place where men feel wrong or perverse for appreciating, complimenting, or being aroused by the feminine form. This is a grave misfortune because the female form is divine and is meant to be honored and appreciated.

I want to hear how a man finds pleasure in the curve of my breast or the sway of my hips. Just as much as I savor when a lover tells me that he enjoys my youthful spirit and how my eyes portray my caring heart. All of these things make up me in my divine feminine and, ultimately, who I am as a whole person… physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. Compliments may be difficult for a woman based upon learned programming, but a woman in tune with herself will revel in these statements. The key is to complement a woman just for the pure pleasure of sharing your pleasure with her and not in order to simply convince her to engage in sexual play. Goddesses are meant to be worshipped just for the pure fact that they are each uniquely and divinely beautiful and in turn, a Goddess who feels worshipped will worship her god!

CALL TO MEN

Play with her; arouse her body and her mind. Fuck her wide open physically and emotionally and watch her become your Dreamgirl. Chase her! Connect to your masculine so she can connect to her feminine. Allow yourself to get unabashedly lost in your thoughts of her mind and body. Tell her how you love her and all the beauty you see deep within her. And allow her to wrap you up in the playful chains of her divine energy. Never get complacent and take her divinity for granted. Continue to hunt to learn every little inch of her and then start all over again to rediscover her day-in and day-out.

CALL TO WOMEN

Don’t settle for anything else than being ravished. Learn to let him in and drop your masculine walls that have been built up through trauma and toil. See yourself as a Dreamgirl, and he will begin to see you that way too. Play with daydreams in your head, listen to music that set you on fire, and explore each and every part of your own body and soul. Allow yourself to surrender into divine moments of bliss. Let him worship you!

 

Need help learning to own your Divine Masculine/Feminine? Help on how to arouse her fully and completely? Or find ways to ‘spice’ things up in the bedroom? Reach out to www.addisonbell.net/contact to work with me TODAY!

Musical Inspiration:

“Dreamgirl”- Dave Matthews Band

“Crash Into Me”- Dave Matthews & Tim Reynolds

Sexual Communication

My cheeks are flushed, my body is radiating heat, and little moans escape my lips. His breath is heavy on my neck as we dive deeper and deeper into a state of passion. The little moans escaping my lips tell him that I am enjoying his touch and he sporadically shares little insights of enjoyment… “Oh, yes,” “You’re amazing,” “Oh, right there,” as I watch his body tremble over and over again with orgasmic energy. As we continue in our play, he enters a state of deep intensity and shifts my positioning. We are in the midst of a passionate animalistic moment when all of a sudden I find myself taken from bliss quickly to severe pain. “Oww! That really hurts. You feel fucking amazing but that’s too deep.” We take a second and try moving slower and less deep but the angle simply isn’t working for my body today. He rapidly switches my position again and we fast approach a deeper state of intimacy. At one point our moans, heavy breath, and sighs are the only form of communication as we are so close that our bodies could melt into each other. We stop several times in our hours of sexing between orgasms to talk with each other about life and our turn-ons… what we like, what we don’t like, and even share a few fantasies until we end the night in a beautiful silence that says more than any words could say.


couple-pillow-talk_pijs35Communication is vitally important in relationships in order to build intimacy. One of the times that it is significant to communicate is in the middle of sex, like the above event. This does not mean we need to stop and have full in-depth conversations while trying to merge sexual energies, although if that’s what is needed then that is an option. There are many different aspects to communicating during these intimate moments and they don’t have to shut the sexing down.

Share your enjoyment! – Sex requires a state of vulnerability and one way to help your partner know you are enjoying things is to tell him/her. Take the time to give your partner kudos for the moments when they are touching you in all the right ways. Allow those deep moans and sexy sighs to slip through those lips and if something is working really well, directly say so… “Wow, that feels amazing!,” “I love when you do that,” etc. Also, making sexy observations can help turn your partner on or simply communicate you are enjoying the situation… “Your breasts look amazing from this angle,” “Your skin is so incredibly soft, ” “You have a beautiful ass,” etc. If you are not verbalizing, then your partner is never going to learn what is working and what your turn-ons are. Your orgasm and pleasure is your responsibility so start talking!

Make adjustments – As much as it’s important to tell your partner if something feels good, it also is vital to tell them if something isn’t working. Like in the above example, sometimes in the midst of things working they suddenly aren’t working and that doesn’t mean anyone is doing anything wrong. What feels fantastic one time may not feel so amazing the next depending on a variety of factors. There are many different ways to ask for adjustments during sex, but no matter how you go about it use direct requests. In the middle of sex, if I need a small adjustment just to increase my overall pleasure then my favorite way to ask is to recognize something that I am really enjoying and then ask for the adjustment. However, when you are engaging in more adventurous play it is important to set up safe words in order to communicate more effectively if things need to quickly change in the situation. Safety should be of the upmost importance during sex due to not only the physical components but also the emotional components. Unless you are able to have those meaningful conversations to communicate your safe words then I strongly suggest avoiding any risky sexual play until you and your partner have come to a more open and communicative place in your relationship.

 Share fantasies – Sometimes in the midst of sex or to get aroused, it can be fun to share fantasies. It can raise the heat in the moment when you tell your partner to envision something. For example, in the midst of sex one day, while my lover is penetrating me, he shared how he could envision us at a club with other men in my mouth as he was having sex with me. He shared how he thought my positioning was the perfect position for other types of play. I played along and began laying out what would be happening in that situation. This mental picture quickly took things to a new level in our sexing that night. Sharing fantasies while having sex or just in daily conversation can tell us more about our partner both sexually and non-sexually. It adds a level of vulnerability into the mix of a relationship.

 Open up your throat chakra – If you want to make sex better then verbalizing will help bring your sexual energy higher by opening up your throat chakra. This helps to keep a healthy flow of energy and so letting those sighs, moans, and screams out will help drop you into a deeper orgasmic state.

 

All of this being said, it is important that your verbalization is authentic. Oftentimes, people will verbalize just because they believe that’s what they are “supposed to do,” which will actually take away from the intimacy and connection in the moment. If you are screaming out then make sure it’s because you are truly in the throws of passion and not just because you think it is what your partner wants! Be authentic and be open during your lovemaking.

Give it a try tonight with your partner!

Spice up your sex life TODAY!… fill out my application for coaching and bodywork at www.addisonbell.net/contact

The Connection of Oral Sex!


There is nothing like the feeling of having my lover deep inside my throat, though I have found, to my surprise, that many women despise orally pleasuring their man.

Often women see this act as a major turn-off or a chore, and engage in it only as a sense of obligation when they want their own oral sex and so will simply deal with it.
I love how I start to tease my lover’s cock with my tongue and then slowly and lightly start to take him into my mouth. The tender but hardened tip rubbing on the back of my throat, my tongue sliding over the tender spot right below the head, and the pulsating in my pussy as I take him just beyond my gag reflex. Hearing his moans and having him run his hands through my hair as I hit all the right spots.
There is nothing like looking up into my lover’s eyes while he is deep into my throat, and to see the passion and vulnerability all in one glance. It’s truly one of the best moments in sex for me.
However, it’s not just hot, but also a spiritual moment for me. This is when I feel connected to my lover as I look into his eyes and see all his barriers vanish and the glow of orgasmic energy radiating from him.
My favorite position to perform oral sex is when I’m on my knees in front of my lover. I find this position both incredibly powerful since I can see my partner’s reaction, and also incredibly humbling as I take in the beauty of the situation. Some would say that this position and this act are demoralizing and take away my power, when, truthfully, these are the moments I feel most powerful and have the most control.
At any point, I have the ability to change speed, stroke, or simply stop. No one is forcing me to engage in this act, I love and revel in this experience.
However, this has not always been the case in my life. I remember the first time I was asked by a boyfriend to give him oral sex; I was disgusted by the thought. I remember being so scared of him ejaculating in my mouth that I was literally shaking. I’ll admit that I ended up throwing up on my boyfriend at the time because honestly, neither of us knew what we were doing.
Also, being the good girl that I was, I had preconceived notions from society about how “good girls didn’t do that.” Well, society was flat wrong! The problem is, many women remain in that state of disgust or are simply ashamed of enjoying performing oral sex well into their adulthood.
Beyond simply enjoying giving oral sex, there are actually many proven benefits to this act.
The power of semen
Semen is almost pure protein, and has the amazing ability to nourish skin, teeth, and hair. The elements of semen act like an astringent and can help clear up skin conditions. Forget all those expensive facial products, ladies!
More benefits of semen
Semen has been shown, in multiple studies, to have natural mood-altering and anti-depressant properties. This is due to semen having the hormone oxytocin, which acts to elevate mood and cortisol, which in turn increases affection. Also, it has trace elements of melatonin, which is a natural sleep-inducing agent. Altogether, they create a non-drug-induced boost of feel-good.
Works muscles
Using your mouth to give your man oral sex will increase the health of your facial muscles, which will decrease fatty tissues, sagging skin, and overall blood flow to your face. This will leave you with glowing skin and a nice toned face that can look years younger.
Helps with lubrication
As women, our vaginas are connected to many other areas of our bodies, and one of these areas is our mouth. When we are engaged with our mouth during sex, this increases arousal and lubrication to make penetrative sex more enjoyable for the woman. So as you are increasing your lover’s arousal, you are also stimulating your own system.
Breathing
Oral sex forces you to use deep belly-breathing, which is a benefit to your own sexual energy. When we are engaging in shallow breathing, it can lead to shallow orgasms and arousal. When giving oral sex, you are no longer able to breathe through your mouth, and so are more likely to engage in diaphragmatic breathing. This will increase your sexual energy flow throughout your body.
These are just a few of the benefits of this type of sex for women, but there are many health benefits for the male too, including, but not limited to, increased sensation, decreased prostate cancers, decreased blood pressure, and many more.
So how do we go from Yuck to Yum?
* Engage in oral sex for your pleasure. As long as you are not causing your partner unwanted pain, have fun with the act. Play with it and do what feels good to your mouth and body. The more fun you allow yourself to have, the more enjoyable it will be for your partner in the end. Slow down and go at the speed that works best for you.
Also, if you are only doing it out of a sense of duty, then your partner is going to feel the difference and you will be creating inauthenticity in the relationship.
* Talk with your partner or to a sex coach about any shame regarding this sexual act. Many women hold old belief systems around what is and is not okay to do in the bedroom. The best way to get past these shame triggers is simply to be vulnerable and talk about them.
Tell your partner what you like and what you don’t like. If you enjoy having your hair pulled while you are doing it, then ask. If you don’t want him to touch you, then ask. If you prefer him lying down instead of standing, then ask. If you don’t want him to cum in your mouth or want him to cum somewhere specific, then ask. Set your boundaries with your man in order to make it pleasurable for both of you.
Most men will be happy to oblige with your desires in this area.
Article posted on Rebelle Society

Lifes Little Orgasms

scientificamericansex0316-4-I1As I sit here in my car in the hot Texas summer, I have a sense of peace in my heart. I look out the car window and am amazed at the beautiful green trees that stand resilient against the beating heat. If you look hard enough you can see a pure white aura glowing from their steady statures. Around is a dazzling blue cornflower blue sky with white puffy clouds that make me want to dive into their marshmallow-ness. Even the soft breeze that blows through my window and dance across my skin takes strands of my hair off on a miniature dance.

I then check in on my body. Warmed skin, energy flowing deep in my belly, a soft breeze touching my cheek, and a tad bit of sleepiness in my eyes. I breathe deep into my diaphragm and note that my chest is slightly constricted from a busy, stressful day.

All of these beautiful things I would be missing out on if not for my intention to stop and really pay attention to not only my body but also my life. It is so easy to get lost in the humdrum daily grind and constant hustle – what I like to call the “hamster wheel” of life that we humans in today’s society so easily find ourselves on.

However, over the last few months I have made an extra special effort to focus in on what is happening in the present moment and tune into both my physical and emotional feelings. So today when I found myself experiencing shallow breathing and a tight chest as well as feeling really disconnected from my own energy, I knew I needed to stop, take a moment, and reconnect.

I could tell you all that I am always calm, collected, and connected…but that would be a lie. I’m totally human and get caught up in my ego and distractions like other humans. The point is that I make the effort to be a constant observer of my life in order to know when something is out of balance. Then I make the effort to make the changes necessary to rebalance my life and my emotions.

In sessions and even in blog posts I often talk quite a bit about orgasm and orgasmic energy. When I speak about this phenomenon I’m not just talking about it in a sexual manner. I’m talking about how our lives can be orgasmic!

The truth is that we can “get off” every time we have sex and still be totally out of whack energetically. Are you missing the little orgasms in your daily life? Are you simply riding the “kiddie ride” of orgasm where the peaks and valleys are shallow and safe?

The truth is that in life we make ourselves incredibly vulnerable if we sink into a Six Flags roller coaster kind of life and orgasmic experience. However, that’s unfortunately where we find the riches of life: happiness and peace. The lows make the highs even more amazing.

ce9827e8c3f270fa4ddd2118599e1737As humans we are very bad at compartmentalizing life. We cannot expect to ride these amazing orgasms in the bedroom but then be constricted in the remainder of our lives. We cannot close down aspects of ourselves and hope to be fully open to experiences that we desire.

I think this is true for both men and women but find that it particularly resonates with women. Our feminine energy and brains are especially not meant to function in this manner. Men often also think they are able to do this but the truth is that they are most likely cutting off their natural feminine energy in order to live in this way, which leads to an imbalance that possibly goes unnoticed.

Having the courage to be vulnerable to the highs, lows, and in betweens of daily life is the only way to fully experience all the wonder that this world holds. Taking the time to recognize ALL aspects of the orgasmic wave of life, including the parts that are uncomfortable, is the way to find ultimate bliss.

Go out today and recognize all the little orgasms in your life and how there is beauty in every moment of everyday if you take the time to open your heart to the world.

In order to gain more perspective and learn how to ride life’s orgasms…reach out to addisonbelltantra@gmail.com

Appointment spaces are limited and so get your coaching/bodywork slot while they are available!