Your Sexual Pleasure is Your Responsibility

“I can’t have good sex because I’m single”
“I can’t have good sex because my partner isn’t into sex”
“I’m not capable of being multi-orgasmic”

Bullsh*t, More Bullsh*it, & an Extra Load of Bullsh*t!!!

You know it at your core but are choosing to push it off on others and play the victim.

Believing that another has that much power over your own body and pleasure. Believing that your partner should be able to send you into orgasmic bliss while you sit there (or lie there) disconnected from self, not embodied, and filled with negative beliefs and holdbacks regarding sex.

Believing that without knowing your own body
That without communicating your needs and desires
& not having any sense of true genital consciousness…

That your partner should magically “give you” a soul-shaking sexual experience!

FYI… no one GIVES us an orgasm.
We must open to it and allow it to flow through our bodies.

Hence why so many women are faking it
And men… every woman has faked it at some point!

Your sexual pleasure is never solely based upon another person.
It is always first and foremost about YOU.

It requires you stopping and learning your own body and desires. It is about you taking the time to constantly turn yourself on!!

I don’t mean that you are sitting at home and masturbating all day long… that’s not our full expression of our sexual pleasure.

I mean that you are alive and present throughout your day and notice all the moments that arouse you. When the breeze hits your skin in just the right way. Or when you are at the gym and see another sexy human and allow yourself to feel the energy this creates. Or getting lost in a moment of fantasy. And yes even taking the time to touch your own body and explore all the different sensations.

When with another person in an intimate moment that you ask for what you need and desire. That you breathe into your own body and get our of your head. That you truly and I mean TRULY connect with your own sensations.

If you are like the average person then you most likely don’t take the time to put all your conscious focus on different parts of your genitals during sex. Instead of focusing in on the mass instead of all the yummy little sensations that arise. The heat… the coolness… the earthiness… the electric.

YOU and YOU ALONE have the key and responsibility over your own sexual pleasure.


Don’t hand me some bullsh*t about how you don’t have a partner or that he/she doesn’t do this or that the right way in the bedroom.

Trust me.. as a single person you can have MIND-BLOWING sexual connections to self and with other

And if you are in a relationship currently you get to step up and have the conversations if you are needing more in the touch and sexual play category.

YOU are choosing to stay in the relationship
YOU are choosing how much power you step into with your sex
YOU are choosing how much pleasure you open and allow
YOU are continuing to choose your thoughts and lean into your outdated beliefs around sex.

Sexual pleasure goes well beyond the act of sex
And it is only your responsibility to cultivate this within yourself.

Having a partner that is aligned with us and in tune with our bodies and needs helps and can make the journey smoother.

Yes, sometimes a partner can help us open up to a new level of our sexual pleasure. I myself have had this experience many times.

But this does not mean it’s their responsibility.

We are the only ones connected with our unique and special brand of sexual energy.
And so it is uniquely ours to explore and expand.

Take time to work with your sexual energy today and see how when your reawaken your sex then you reawaken your life!

Addison Bell


This year I had some friends visit me a little early and give me some nudges towards helping you jump into this new decade in charge and in love with your SEX, your PURPOSE, and your LIFE!!

Check out these deals that are only good until Dec 26th when all good little elves head home.
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