Those moments driving down the road with our hair blowing in the wind, blasting oldies as I held your hand so tight…

That moment when I asked you to stop, naked, standing there like a God just so I could admire your beauty…

That moment of fast and furious passion where we both knew we were saying goodbye.

I remember these moments and I hold them dear, just the same as when we held each other dear in those times. Having the best of intentions but falling short along the way. For ourselves and for each other.

And I could sit and get sad, and sometimes I do. I long to time travel back with your arms wrapped around my middle and feel your soft skin against my back. Though more than that, these moments still steal my breath when I pause to reminisce. They break a smile a mile wide on my face and I feel blessed to have had those moments in my life.

In relationships, all kinds of relationships, but especially our intimate relationships, it can be easy to fall into what could have been and stay stuck. Instead of a quick reminisce we instead we stay in a state of constant grieving. Grieving for the person we were and the dreams we had created in that relationship. Desiring to pull that same energy back into this moment when the fact is that energy is ever changing and never to return in quite the same way.

We often refuse to move forward because it won’t look the same.

Often missing out on the beauty that is meant for us in the future.

When it hurts to lose a relationship and your still feel a heart tug… that means it mattered! It means that you are capable of loving and being loved at that level. There was something worthwhile in that connection.

And that person you were is still deep down within but older, wiser, and having a greater knowledge of self.

Our relationships are our best teachers!

People are beautiful mirrors for us of both our shadow and light. Without relationships we lose a massive amount of our growth process.

As a Sex & Relationship Coach, people often tell me they are waiting to fully heal before entering a new relationship and there are times when we need to take a break to look inwards before continuing unhealthy patterns. Though at times this is an excuse to not open our hearts after they’ve been wounded and a way to control our the chances of pain in the future.

We will never be finished with ourselves and any partner, friend, loved one will also have their fair of hurts & hang-ups as well. We are all a little incomplete.

But if we can pick-up the people, parts, and memories of ourselves and our past and look to creating beautiful memories in the future. Memories that are different but just as important, we give ourselves a opportunity to fully live.

Maybe our hearts are still a little broken and we feel a little beat down but finding new spaces to create love and connection will always lead to new adventures and opportunities.

So keep remembering all those moments. Embody them and feel them. But also spend just as much time dreaming and creating the new. We get to choose how to look at the past… in joy and with fondness or in pain and an unfulfilled wishing.

~Reawaken Your Life~


Sex & Orgasmic Frequency Coach, Energyworker, +Life Activator